When I was pregnant, the lovely ladies from the knitting class I used to teach threw a little baby shower for me. And as we were opening gifts (they were all children’s books and some of the sweetest I’ve ever seen/read) and enjoying each other’s company, Anne said to me. And if you ever feel down and it’s lingering and lingering don’t chalk it up to “par for the course”, talk to someone. Call me…”the baby blues” can be a very subtle and insidious thing. You don’t always see it coming and then you can be in trouble. Well I didn’t but it came and I’d call crying almost every day trouble.
Call it hormones, call it whatever you want but my anxiety over “am I doing the right thing” was becoming so overwhelming that I just didn’t know what to do with myself or my little girl. And then one day my husband grabbed me by the shoulders, kissed me and said you’re doing a great job, an amazing job. Kira is happy and healthy and loves her mummy but it’s time for mummy to do something for herself.
Which leads to the other thing that was getting to me. As you may or may not have noticed we didn’t go to the Sheep and Wool festival this year. It was such a hard decision but the weather was just too awful to be toting a 5 month old around worry. So that means I missed Knitting Camp, The Sock Summit, Sheep and Wool Festival and then Stitches East (We even tried to attend that, just to shop a bit but again bad weather and two-hour car ride (one way) was not going to work). Is it ok for the Mum to stomp her feet a bit? Yes!
I also want to take a moment and publicly apologize to my darling husband for not trusting him the way I should have regarding our daughter. I’m so sorry. I know you forgive me but I’ve been so hard on you…Forgive me. And again I refuse to say it was just hormones. We all know when we’re beening “not nice”. I was really not nice.
I won’t bore you anymore with all the epiphanies I’ve had in the last few days and with how crappy I’d been feeling for the last month suffice it to say. I’m back, I love my family, I trust myself and all is well again in our/my world.
So here’s a bit of what we’ve been up to…
Check out my girl’s new ride…the big girl high chair and Solid Food…(that’s worth a whole other post)
Look what I can do?
Like my fangs!?!
I am Tigger…Tigger is me!
A very special day…
Endless gratitude for my family…
Kira looks happy and healthy, as do you all. You’re all doing a great job! I remember journaling after my first was born, wondering if happy was just the absence of unhappy for him. It all got worked out; he’s 21 and doing fine.
And so are you!
Hugs, Michele
Yeah! Your here! I’ve missed you. Kira is the happiest baby I remember ever seeing. You are awesome at this mommy thing and I’m lucky your my friend. Did you get the “Yarnia” funny I sent? Hope it gave you a chuckle. Tell Kira Auntie Karen says Hi!
Good things…and you have The Best….and you do deserve them All. So often others see that which we are either trying to hide or that which is sneeking up upon us, yes indeed. Glad you’ve worked through your period…and keep working with all those close by who can help by their proximity.
Epiphanies are blessings and thank God we get them as it means he is not done with us yet.
Keep on keeping on my sistah! And continue to walk in L.O.V.E. with your family!
So happy you are blogging again. I’m happy you are over that blue period also. I had it really bad with my daughter so I remember it well. How wonderful that you have husband, family and friends to support you. Of course you’re a wonderful mother and wife !!!
So glad you’re back and feeling better. I’ve missed you. We’ll have to chat sometime and fully catch up.
Kira looks like she growing in leaps and bounds. She is as beautiful as her mum.
It’s interesting how we all think think that the blues won’t hit us, especially if we had to work a little harder for that little one. We’re sure that nothing will be able to get us down when we have what we have only hoped and dreamed for, for so long. Reality is, so many of us struggle. We often set such incredibly high standards for ourselves, usually unreachable. I know, without a doubt, that you are a fantastic wife and mother. Sounds like Chris stepped in and helped you refocus and know that one of the biggest things you can give Kira is a healthy mum, who takes time for herself, so she can be her best for Kira.
As I’ve thought ever since I bet you, you’re awesome! Kira is as lucky to have you, as you are to have her.